Menopause
can bring substantial and startling changes in the breasts – so let me tell you
a little of the story of me and my breasts. I tell it in the hope you can
leverage the knowledge for your good or that of someone close to you.
When they
first appeared I found them inconvenient – they split my nicest dresses at the
arms, bounced and were painful. Sheesssh!
Bras were uncomfortable and chaffed to the point of torture – why do people
think seams rubbing on one of the most delicate areas of the body is a good
idea????
Note: Some people, both men and women, have
very sensitive breasts and nipples and some do not. Forcing someone to wear a
rough material (or indeed a silky, sensual material) can be torture or at least
elicit inappropriate sensations.
ANYWAY –
for roughly the next 30 years I did not think much about my breasts except to
ensure modesty and to make sure they did not hurt. I appreciated them for being
small and pert as I did not need to wear a bra and generally they kept out of
the way. It did not really occur to me that breasts could be attractive to men.
Yes REALLY!
Then came
incipient menopause. First my breasts lost some density. I was shocked, but
tried to think positively. They were still pert, I could still wear my tailored
blouses and actually as they gained a little swing, they looked bigger! BONUS!
By now I realised men were REALLY attracted to breasts!
Then as my
hormones finally stopped, my breasts suddenly slumped and slipped down my chest
– since the change was so sudden it was more shocking. I am sure my nipples are
5 cm lower than they were. I can no longer wear many of my tops without a bra.
I was DEVASTATED! Cue real grieving!
Note: It is truly alarming and there is real
grieving when a part of your body changes/deteriorates so much. It is natural
to grieve and feel desperate and sad and willing to do anything to get back
what you have lost. Rather than do something irreversible in desperation - like with anything – it’s best to wait a while and work through your
feelings.
So now I
have a choice – wear very camouflaging top garments to hide my sagging breasts
or wear a bra! Goodness – the
struggle continues to find bras that will not chaff and which are comfortable.
Added to the usual complaints, my less dense breast tissue does not hold the
bra down so well, so inevitably the band slips up over a little of my lower
breast tissue and as well crushes some of the tissue on the side of my breasts.
This can be UNBEARABLE! <sigh>
…time has
passed ….
Even though
I may be uncomfortable when I choose to wear a bra, I’ve developed a much more
positive attitude to my breasts as they are now. They are still soft and nice
to touch and they still look great with the right undergarments. They even seem
to be a little larger … and … best of all, Awesome still likes them just as
much. Really, I’ve got nothing to complain about!
Note: Lovers and partners are really important
in maintaining one’s self esteem and self-perception of attractiveness. Be
patient and listen and also know when to short-circuit obsessive concern with
body changes that are natural and, well, not so important in the big picture.
Above all, if you find us attractive, we’ll be more likely to believe we are
attractive!
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| Two orchids of suprising beauty! |
